Dealing with your ex spouse dating
Especially since he was going to be there for the weekend!
Now before I continue, let me just say that I'm only human and even after all this time I'm still learning from my mistakes.
But at the same time, if you do wind up in the same place as them, just keep away from them. Source: Shutter Stock I know, I know - how are you supposed to not think about something that feels like the worst thing in the world? When my ex immediately jumped to a new girl, I was devastated. For me, the best distraction was work - I started working overtime and really threw myself into everything I did. Source: Shutter Stock Comparing yourself to this new girl will do nothing to make you feel better. Is telling yourself she's prettier going to make you feel better? You're probably feeling pretty let down right now - your ex not only left you but also "replaced" you.
I’ve been in this situation myself and all I can say is…
You found out that your Ex is sleeping with someone new. It sounds simple enough, but it’s very easy to get swept away in our thoughts without even noticing what’s happening. If shifting mentally is too hard you can also shift your attention to something that is happening in the present moment: Watching a movie, listening to music, or petting your dog.
Now, waves of rage, pain, self-doubt, and resentment are crashing over you. The practice: As soon as you become aware that you are thinking about your Ex, say, (out loud, if necessary) “I am thinking about something that is not happening right now.” Repeat this to yourself a few times as needed. Shifting is important because the thoughts we habitually think about get stronger.
It’s worst at night, when there are no distractions. So when you’re imagining your Ex and their new sex partner making out on the couch, you react to it emotionally (and physically) like you were seeing it happen right in front of you: Your heart starts racing, you feel nauseous, and you are filled with pain and rage.
He’s probably taking her to that restaurant I always wanted to go to that he said was too expensive. You see your Ex — the happy, sweet, fun one you first fell in love with — sharing the best parts of themselves (and hiding the rest). Join EXaholics.com, a caring community healing from heartbreak] Believe it or not, the part of your brain that sees things in your mind’s eye cannot differentiate between something that you’re thinking about and something that is actually happening.
Source: Shutter Stock If your ex is dating a new girl, now is probably not the best time to try to win him back. Source: Shutter Stock Just because your ex seems like he moved on pretty quickly doesn't mean you have to. A breakup isn't also a race as to who can move on the fastest.